What is "Hitting Bottom"?

You may have heard this term before, especially if you’ve worked with a sober coach in New York, because it has escaped from the recovery community and become a part of the outside world's lexicon. And you probably have a pretty good intuitive sense of its meaning. But it's worth exploring the concept of hitting bottom in more detail.

Substances are a fact of modern life. Alcohol is everywhere, woven through the fabric of most Western cultures, especially in holidays and celebrations. Prescription drugs have made the average person's life longer, healthier, and more comfortable. Recreational marijuana is swiftly becoming legalized, and socially acceptable, in much of the US. Finally, illegal drugs are everywhere, used by people at every level of society.

Substances can be a healthy part of a normal life. A few beers after work helps people to "take the edge off," aiding in relaxation. A few glasses of wine a week might be good for your heart. Coffee is not even considered a drug — even though most Americans are addicted to it — because the amount people use usually doesn't cause their lives to implode.

So this is the key to understanding what it means to "Hit Bottom." Is your use of substances having negative impacts on your life, and are you losing control of how much you use?

Some quick diagnostic questions you might consider:

Has your drinking or drug use ever had a negative impact on your health?

For example, have you sought treatment, medicine, or surgery because of something that happened to you because of your drinking or substance use?

Has your use ever had a negative impact on your job performance?

Has your work ever suffered because you were hung over — or intoxicated? Have you ever called in sick because you overdid it the night, day, or weekend before? Has your focus or performance ever been effected to the point that someone mentioned it?

Has your use ever had a negative impact on your finances?

Have you been spending more than you used to on your substances? Have you been cutting back on other expenditures to preserve funds for your favorite substances? Is your bar tab so big you're afraid to ask? Have you found yourself in debt because of poor choices around your use? Have you gotten in car accidents that cost you money or raised your insurance premiums because you were operating under the influence?

Has your use ever had a negative impact on your appearance?

Have you noticed changes to your face or body that make you unhappy? Have other people commented on your appearance — like frequent observations that you look "tired"?

Has your use ever had a negative impact on your relationships with friends, partners, or family members?

Have you stopped hanging out with certain friends because they can't keep up with you, or because they judge you, or have made comments about your use? Have your family members expressed concern or grown distant — or have you started avoiding them? Have you found yourself hanging out with people that use more than you — because they make you feel like your use isn't that bad?

Has your use ever had a negative impact on your residential or legal status?

Have you ever had to move, or leave a shared residence, because of your use? Have you ever had legal consequences of your use — like a suspended license — or have you ever been charged with, or convicted of, a crime that would not have happened without drinking or drugs being involved? Have you spent time in jail or prison?

Whew! Take a breath.

Reading those questions can be a lot. Maybe you finished reading them thinking "hey, maybe I'm not so bad, I haven't been incarcerated!"

Maybe you thought "what the difference between jail and prison?"

Maybe you thought "this is ridiculous, everybody can say yes to SOME of these."

The fact is, if you said yes to ANY of them, you might have a problem. It's not for me to diagnose anyone as an alcoholic or drug addict. But if you are on this website, it's likely that you, or someone you love, needs help.

So what is "Hitting Bottom" already?

Okay! The term "hitting bottom" conjures images of the homeless man sleeping on the street, begging for change, wearing filthy clothes and foraging for food in dumpsters. Frankly, most of us don't get to that point (though many do). In fact, hitting bottom just means that you get to a point where you have had enough. People who have hit bottom say that they were "sick and tired of feeling sick and tired." Does that describe you?

One of the surest signs that you have hit bottom is that you are asking for help, or trying to quit. Life in the grip of addiction is painful, difficult, shameful, and isolating. It is lonely. The good news is that millions of people have gotten sober, and you can too. 12-step programs are an amazing resource to find a community of sober people who are willing and eager to help you.

Sober Coaching — the service I offer as a sobriety coach in New York — gives you one-on-one attention to address your problem, whatever it is. You don't have to be living on the street to have hit bottom. You don't have to have lost your spouse, custody of your kids, or your driver's license. You just have to have had enough.

Sign up for a free 30-minute consultation to see how I can help you. Sometimes, hitting bottom just means you decide to stop digging.